Brutal Publicist

I couldn’t go with something simple and dignified to pay tribute to Ryan Owens, the fallen Navy SEAL who died in the ill-fated Yemen mission.  No, I said, we have to have the widow here, with tears streaming down her face. What a great visual!  A truly powerful moment that’ll evoke extended applause.  And I…

“The time has come,” the Walrus said, “To talk of many things: Issues–bullsh!t–concealing facts– My scab–bitches–and kings– And why D.C. is boiling hot– And whether pigs have wings.” “But wait a bit,” the Trumpsters cried, “Before our CPAC chat; For most of us are out of breath, And some of us are fat!” “No hurry!”…

President Donald Trump campaigned on bringing jobs back to the U.S.  And by jobs, he meant good old manufacturing jobs, not some fancy pants software jobs or consulting services, or golf course design or hotel management. REAL JOBS! Many expressed skepticism over his ability to deliver on this promise, and dismissed his claims as general…

The common wisdom is that President Donald J. Trump does not have an unexpressed thought, that everything that pops into his head is immediately put out into the twitterverse or interjected into a conversation or speech.  However, the revelation that he has kept a diary since being elected President belies that belief.  Here are some…

Almost President Donald Trump announced that he has written his Inaugural Address himself.  Many people are saying they doubt he could do it, but the following text, leaked by the Trump Transition Team, lends credence to his claim.  No paragraph is longer than 140 characters, so it is entirely possible the Tweeter-in-Chief did compose it…

“My Way – Special for the Trump Inaugural” For the first dance at the official Inaugural Ball, celebrating America First!, President Elect Trump booked a Canadian singer-songwriter. He’s the crooner whose name looks like Ivanka — Paul Anka, who penned the iconic song, My Way, best remembered in classic performances by Sinatra and Elvis.  He…

Donald Trump is like all of us who make sincere resolutions to improve ourselves at the first of the year, only to find that we have revise them if we are to have any hope of actually carrying them out.  His staff leaked the latest updated version to the L.A. Star. Fewer wacko tweets at…

Stymied in their attempts to line up top name entertainment for the Trump Inaugural, the Trump Team has scrambled to find a suitable line-up of acts and events.  So they have done what others have done who can’t get premier performers: they have rounded up several tribute bands and organized party games.  Here’s what they…

The Los Angeles Star found striking similarities between (1) Items on 10-Year Old Donnie Trump’s Christmas List and (2) 70-Year Old Donald Trump’s Christmas List Super Secret Decoder Ring Carrier Pigeon Set with Coded Messages. Jimmy Smith from school – make him get bugs in his shorts Enemies in press and government — make them…

The Trump Transition has been hard at work rewarding supporters and contributors with Cabinet positions and plotting ways to screw their enemies.  In the spirit of Christmas, Trump put together a Naughty and Nice List, to ensure that they don’t get the two mixed up. Here’s a peek: Mitt Romney – Naughty.  Mitt was a…

Even if you’re not a fan of Trump, Putin, or Kellyanne Conway, you’ve got to admit they have a point when it comes to the demoralized Clinton campaign team and the stream of excuses that have been dribbling out from them.  It’s Putin’s fault, it’s Comey’s fault, it’s Assange’s fault. It’s everyone’s fault but their…

A questionaire from Donald Trump’s Transition Team to the Department of Energy demanding information on DOE officials’ participation in climate change conferences and activities caused anxiety within the workforce and provoked angry reactions from partisans on the other side of the issue. Less publicized were the Trump Team’s questions and directives to other Departments and…