President Trump’s Official Schedule often contains this notation “The President has no public events scheduled.”  Some skeptics have erroneously conclude this means the President is not doing anything productive for lengthy periods of time.  Nothing could be further from the truth, as shown by this internal schedule, which was leaked by several White House sources.

3:00-3:30 AM – Toilet Tweeting.

5:30-6:00 AM — Watch tapes of Lou Dobbs “Tonight” & “live” tweet about it.

6:00-10:00 AM — Watch Fox and Friends and quote friendly guest and host comments in Twitter Stream.  Get policy ideas from Steve Doocy.  On special days, call in to the show.

10:00-10:30 AM – Obsess about Obama & tweet about him.

10:30-11:30 AM – Obsess about Mueller & tweet about him.

11:30 AM -12:30 PM Big Mac PLUS KFC Bucket for Lunch!

12:30-2:30 PM Obsess over who “Anonymous” Op-Ed writer is. Figure out clever ways to ferret him/her out & devise a suitable punishment!

2:30-3:00 PM Order Sessions to FIND THE TRAITOR!

3:00-4:30 PM Obsess over Hillary Clinton and tweet about her.

4:30-5:30 PM Obsess about “tremendous” Electoral College win & whine that how no one talks about it.

5:30-6:00 PM 2 Big Macs, 1 bucket of KFC & 3 Scoops of ice cream!!

6:00-9:00 PM Watch tapes of Trump rallies, be dazzled by spectacular oratory & “sing along” with “Trump’s Greatest Hits”!! Obsess over people in crowd who aren’t “enthusiastic’ enough.  Order Secret Service & FBO to track them down & hold them in custody on National Security grounds!

9:00-10:00 Watch Hannity.

10:00-11:00 Call/Policy Briefing with Hannity. “You hang up first!” . . . “No, you hang up first!”